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About Me Member Art Student dragonrock1890318/United States Recent Activity Deviant for 2 Years
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Hell Explained by a Chem Student

Wed Jan 7, 2009, 10:03 PM
  • Mood: Isolated
  • Listening to: Blueman Group
  • Reading: kigo fanfic
  • Watching: nothing
  • Playing: Kingdom Hearts: Re- Chain of Memories
  • Eating: nothing
  • Drinking: diet coke
So my uncle always sends me these weird, and most of the time, stupid emails, But this one is really funny... don't read if you are sensitive to religious stuff.


The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term.

The answer by one student was so ' profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :


Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle 's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you ar e not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle 's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over! The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.

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Comments


:iconx-de3pwater-x:
Tucker. do you know Nemo's dA?

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- Imagination is more important than knowledge - Albert Einstein [~cool music video~]
:icondragonrock18903:
ichigosoul. hes rarely on though.

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...That's what she said...
:iconkisaxkyo:
Hey tucker. how's college so far? Truffles misses you alot. so u better come back to Cerritos to visit and all

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Giggling is bad for my digestion...

---kisa.
:icondragonrock18903:
its really fun. we had a 4 day ornamentation, but now that the classes have started, thins are starting to get really busy.

hows being a senior?

i'm coming back for x-mas, but i have to leave by the 3rd XP

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...That's what she said...
:iconkisaxkyo:
oh, i c!~ ^^
srry for the late reply..i have 7th period from tues to thurs. and i barely have time ta go these days...T^T

being a senior is somewhat ok.i have johnstone for econ. and thats a pain in the ass..i miss u guys.... norman and the others visited school during lunch last week..i almost cried T^T

Yay, u'll visit! i fixed the zipper on ur coat and dry-cleaned it ^^ i still have to give it to ryan so he can give it to his sister

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Giggling is bad for my digestion...

---kisa.
:icondragonrock18903:
ewww.... 7th period. Why is he a pain? is he hard, or does he give out lots of work (i had wat... the coolest XD). thats cool. they go to school close, so they can, but i think they all have very different schedules.

thanks! yeah... i was kind of hoping to get it back before i left, but i guess not. i don't really see much of rosan anymore, but i'll be back for x-mas. when is your break?

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...That's what she said...
:iconbudiana:
I FOUND J00~~

Guess who this is? :D
(hint:username rhymes with...)

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Bloop. :"D
:icondragonrock18903:
Hey! You're actually on XD

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...That's what she said...
:iconbudiana:
Haha, I commented but forgot to watch you. ; w ;

Hmm, need to rummage through my thousand-some deviations. : D

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Bloop. :"D
:icondragonrock18903:
dang... good luck with that.

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...That's what she said...

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